Snazzy Snippets // read fetus sophia's bad writing

So this round of Snazzy Snippets is technically Childhood Edition, but I decided to ignore questions 2 and 3 and just inundate you with my answer to question number 1:

A snippet from something your wrote more than 2 years ago.

I scoured my basement and family bookshelves for my childhood scribbles, and I was EXTREMELY SUCCESSFUL in my quest. Travel with me into my hobbit history, and cringe with me at my "stories." (Though I realize that I didn't write enough of my crazy ideas down, so I share my thought processes too.) Shall we dive into the madness?

*whoosh**time traveling noises**it's 2005*

my first ever notebook (thanks for writing dates on all my scribble-books, mom!)

The evil Butler Matt

Almost-9-year-old me has just discovered that I can WRITE BOOKS. (Before this, I thought writers were magical sorcerers or something, beings with powers far beyond those of mere mortals like myself.) My first novel is called Great-Great-Aunt and tells of the adventures of a family going to stay with their 99 year old Great-Great-Aunt Margie (who is extremely lively for her age) and the conflict involved Great-Great-Aunt's butler irrational hate of children (which is suddenly resolved without any sort of explanation because I am sick of this story and want to end it fast and write something with MAGIC). This book is five chapters long and involves a very innocent Chapter 3 that I just read out loud with my father and sister, and we all laughed way too hard at all the unintentional sexual innuendos. Oh innocent baby Sophia. I'm not sharing those here but I might on twitter eventually... if I feel like it... ;) Behold instead some other pages of my manuscript, rife with illustrations, cross-outs, and misspellings.

After conveniently finishing that book, I move on to A FANTASY NOVEL OBVIOUSLY because WHAT IS A STORY WITHOUT MAGIC? It's called Princess Katherine and is abandoned after two pages.

Soon after, I move on to The Magic Door which is basically Narnia, except Professor Diggory Kirke is an old, grumpy, and old fashioned man named Mr. Wistly. Oh, and all the children have names that start with the letter S because that's not confusing at all. (You can also always tell how old I am because it's the narrator's age too. *coughcough*MarySue*coughcough* Particularly here because her name is FREAKING SOPHIE. NOT OBVIOUS AT ALL SOPHIA.)


Obviously, my best work is the prophecy that the children find:


That book is left unfinished, right after I introduce an actually fascinating character named Duke Kochel, who is actually a pig in a tri-corner hat.

Next, I begin my first story that actually has a tiny sliver of potential. I call it Edwarde Story, beginning a long tradition of placeholder titles. (Years later, I try again and rename it Kings and Traitors.) IT IS NOT NARNIA, which is something to be proud of. IT IS ALSO PLOTTED ALL THE WAY THROUGH (though not written all the way through), and even has a SEQUEL PLOTTED OUT ALL THE WAY THROUGH which is (if you know my current plotting troubles) something absolutely to be proud of. (2006 Sophia the Plotting Queen please come back!) However, the writing is still obviously cringey, and I actually refer to someone as "substantially pretty," at one point. Like, what does that even mean? Her prettiness had substance? Sophia, what?
Below is my hero being all pensive in a dungeon.

I decide next to try my hand at romance (though still within the genre of fantasy and adventure), and started Over the Mountains, about a badass peasant girl who is recruited to guide a prince over the mountains and to his home. This one was also plotted all the way to the end - granted, it was only 8 chapters long from beginning to end, but still, child-Sophia, please come back with your plotting abilities!

Also, I don't know if you've noticed, but I had a thing for naming my characters normal names but SPELLED INSANELY. Alyce, Olyver, Nykolas, Wyliom, and PHREDRICK. SERIOUSLY.

And now we reach 2007 and The Ancora. I don't really know how to summarize this book. It involved a boy named Alon who somehow got wound up with a bunch of outlaws in a heist to steal a powerful jewel called the Ancora while simultaneously on the search for his father. I even dressed up as one of the lady outlaws for Halloween that year. Think LOTR meets Robin Hood meets God-Knows-What-Goes-On-In-11-Year-Old-Sophia's-Head, and that's basically what this is.

It had a plot bunny of a sequel called The Vong which was basically The Ancora meets mystic cults, and thankfully that plot bunny withered and died.

I think we'll end on that note, yes? Would you actually READ any of these books? And I want to hear about YOUR crazy childhood writing. Isn't it so fun to travel back in time like this?

Snazzy Snippets // Valentine Edition

It's time for some more Snazzy Snippets (hosted by Emily and Alyssa)! This time we're talking about romance (though my snippets aren't really SUUPER romantic). I really, really wanted to share some snippets from CamelotNovel, which is a contemporary retelling (ish?) of the King Arthur myth, but according to certain promises I made to myself last month, I shouldn't be writing that until I finish SlavicNovel.

So I thought that if I share some more SlavicNovel snippets, I'll get back into Slavic-mood and maybe finally get that one done? Endings are so SO hard for me, especially when they involve epic fantasy with lots of threads to be tied up and everyone counting on the climax to get it all done.


#1: A HEARTWARMING SNIPPET THAT MAKES READERS GO "AWW!" - my story doesn't have very many awwww moments. I'm not sure if it's that heartwarming yet, really. I mean, it might be eventually, but now everyone's either super snarky or super seductive or super murderous. So this is as heartwarming as it gets.

Oriana squeezed her eyes shut and groaned. When she opened them again, she dug her hands into the pockets of her trousers and pursed her lips. 

“Damla,” she said. “I want you to know that I think you are a good fighter. And not just a good one - an excellent one. That’s why I wanted you on my team. When you spoke in front of my Otamans, I realized I had made a good decision.” She paused, and Damla didn’t say anything. She wasn’t going to leap back into agreement with Oriana at the hint of apology. Also, hadn’t it been Damla that had done the decision-making? 

“Please stay,” Oriana said quietly. “I may not need you, but I definitely want you - and appreciate you.” 

#2: A KISSING SNIPPET - How could I resist sharing more sexy mermaids when it asked for kissing? 

Laryssa reached over and twirled a strand of Tania’s dark hair around her finger. 

“I’m glad you’re my friend, darling,” she said, and Tania found it extremely hard to push away the thoughts of apple cider and sunsets and comfort. Laryssa’s eyes were remarkably green, she noticed, green and deep and beautiful. A small part of her mind wondered why she noticed that, and why Laryssa’s face was suddenly so near to hers, but the rest of her waded deep into the comfort of Laryssa’s smile.

Tania had never been kissed. She had never considered the prospect of kissing anyone. Particularly, she had definitely never considered the prospect of being kissed by a girl, let alone a mermaid. But when Laryssa’s lips met hers, all Tania knew was that this was the most soul-wrenchingly beautiful thing she had every felt and that she never wanted this to end.

Not even when Laryssa, gently caressing her, still with their lips pressed together, dragged her down the bank.

Not even when the water lapped up through her clothes and up her neck.

Not even when the mermaid, with a final flick of her tail, pulled Tania’s head below the waves, and all faded away in a purple mist.

#3: A SNIPPET WHERE LOVE INTERESTS FIRST APPEAR TOGETHER - I still haven't decided if I want Tania and Stefan to be a thing, so have Oriana and Misha instead. 

"My angel!” a man standing at the gate shouted, and Oriana grinned. 

“Shut up, idiot!” she yelled back. 

The man bowed with a flourish, a smirk on his face.

What writerly things have you been up to? How was your Valentine's day? (Mine was very Danish which means I didn't celebrate at all! I had family brunch instead.) 

 

Snazzy Snippets // New Year Edition!

Welcome to my second time participating in Snazzy Snippets hosted by Emily and Alyssa. 

Enjoy these bits from my current WIP SlavicNovel while I'm off writing it's conclusion. :-)

#1: A SNIPPET FROM PAGE 16 - Have you bloglings met my mermaids yet? I don't think so. Here's Rusalka doing what she does best, and poor little Stefan not knowing what hit him.

She folded her arms on the riverbank and gazed lazily at him, her hair lying in a silver wave over her pale skin and bare breasts. 

“Hullo,” Stefan said quietly, blushing. “I - I didn’t mean to interrupt. I can leave - if you like.” He turned away, running his hands through his hair. 

“Oh, don’t leave,” she said. He turned back, eyes widening at the sound of her voice. 

“Come closer, princeling,” the mermaid whispered. “I’ve been waiting for you.” 

Stefan blinked and grinned. “Oh. Really?” 

She nodded, eyelashes fluttering slowly.. “Ages.  Come closer. I’ve got something to show you.” 

He glanced for a moment up the tree where Tania had disappeared, then back at the mermaid. 

“No, don’t worry about her,” she murmured, pulling herself up a bit onto the riverbank. “Come over here to me.” 

Stefan couldn’t remember walking over to the bank and kneeling down in the mud. Somehow, he found himself leaning over the water, gazing into the diamond eyes that beckoned him further into their depths. 

“Hello, princeling,” the mermaid whispered, her voice cascading into his soul. With a long pale finger, she tucked a strand of his hair behind his blushing ear. 

He hesitantly leaned in for a kiss.

#2: A SNIPPET OF 16 WORDS OR FEWER - I can't resist some good Baba Yaga. Especially if it's EXACTLY 16 words.

"Who's he anyway? He looks suspiciously cheerful for being covered in mud. I don’t trust him.”

#3: A SNIPPET ABOUT SOMETHING NEW - Martin is new according to the original plot. He wasn't supposed to be in the story and then he was! And he's making Damla discuss the philosophies of war and possibly fall in love with him when she's supposed to be staunchly single. Why don't my characters just follow the instructions of my sticky-note plotting?

He raised up his hands in submission. “I’m not going to argue with you, little patriot,” he said quietly. “I didn’t come to talk battles. In fact, I came to enjoy the view during the small time I have to not talk about fighting.” 

Damla immediately felt chastened. “Sorry,” she muttered. “I should have known better.” 

“Don’t worry about it,” he said, turning to her with a smile. “Both sides have been wronged, and only God knows who’s in the right. The name’s Martin, by the way.” He stuck out a hand, and she took it, cautiously. 

“Damla,” she said, as he raised it up slightly, then let it go.  

“May I say that I hope your stay in my country is memorable in the best of ways?” he said, with a smile.  

“Thank you,” she said, and though she didn’t mean to, she somehow found herself slightly smiling back. Martin turned on his heel and wandered off, and Damla was left alone to watch as the sail ship slid into the rivers of the delta, toward the fortress-island of Nul.

I hope you enjoyed these snippets! Did you join the linkup? Share your snippets with me in the comments!

Snazzy Snippets // NaNoWriMo Edition

I'm fully into NaNoWriMo, and this year it's coming along marvelously! I'm steadily a day ahead in my word count, which I am OVERJOYED with. And I'm loving my novel. It has no title yet, but it does have a pinterest, which you can check out if you'd like.

Snazzy Snippets is a (bimonthly?) linkup hosted by Emily and Alyssa. It's a chance for us to share our writing, which I rarely do (because my babiiiiieeees are preciiiousssssss). So what better time to join in than NaNoWriMo? (Also, that means this snippet is pure first draft, so not superbly beautiful. Bear with me.)

I'm sharing a snippet that falls under the second prompt: a snippet featuring a friend/family member of your protagonist. And, since my protagonist obviously has no friends (as you will find out from the snippet), you get to meet her grandfather!

Enjoy!

“Tania,” said her grandfather, slowly stumping over to the cupboard and pulling out the tea. “What was all that outside?”

Tania frowned, and said nothing, instead reaching for the cat that rubbed up against her ankles. She tried to pick it up but it scowled and dashed off. 

“Stupid cat,” she muttered. “Make up your mind.”

“Tania,” her grandfather repeated, a little more intently. “Leave the cat alone. What happened outside? Marika is a nice girl and I don’t want you getting into fights.”

Tania flopped down onto the chair by the door and closed her eyes. 

“Marika is a judgmental harpy, and the rest of this village is just like her.”

Her grandfather sighed and turned to the fire. “Honeybee. Help me make tea?” he asked, and Tania pushed the stray hairs that had escaped her braid out of her eyes and got up. As she hooked the tea kettle onto the metal rod over the fireplace, she felt her grandfather’s calloused hand touch her shoulder.

“Were they talking about your mother?” he asked gently.

“They didn’t expressly say it, but I could feel they wanted to,” she said, turning to face him. “It’s not my fault my mother couldn’t have children. Why do I have to live with her twisted decisions?”

“You are the reason for her ‘twisted’ decisions,” said her grandfather. “She loved you so much that she was willing to danger her life for the chance of giving birth to you.”

“So I was born. And then she died,” Tania replied bitterly. “All her efforts to have a child were pointless, because then she didn’t even get to enjoy me or take care of me. And I’m left with them.” She waved her hand dismissively towards the street. 

The old man sighed and sat down creakily into the chair by the fire. “Are you really having that much trouble with your friends, honeybee?”

Tania scoffed and threw a twig into the fire, making it crackle. “Friends. They hate me. They think I’m cursed. I don’t have friends.” She wished she could throw this whole damn village into the fire and watch it crackle. Then she’d live with her grandfather alone – and in peace.

So there's that! Share your snippets with me! How's your NaNo going?